GTOC Blog #40....the Woman's Voice.

We spend, it seems an eternity remaining silent.  Life continues around us.  Are we even sure if we are contributing or simply witnessing it pass?

Inside we know...wrongs are being done.

Inside we scream...there is more...what is it?

Inside we tell ourselves what generations before also said to themselves, "be silent, endure, love and teach"

The traditional woman.  There are some of us that were raised to be traditional women.

There are many of us.

We have keenly watched the brave words of a few women and have been inspired by their Voice.

Yet we remain silent because we believe we have no voice.

Or perhaps our voice is being created through our daughters.

Perhaps like all good women, we wish for better for our daughters than we had for ourselves.

And that raging voice inside is reflected in our silent actions.

Our children are growing up in a world that is "more aware".  We are the generation that either got left behind or joined in the "global awareness".

I began my journey "left behind".

Through witnessing my efforts and my failures, my daughters have become women with voices.  There will never be any "settling in life" for them.

Through their love and support of me, (and I must include my son's in this as well)...my children have not only fought for me to stand in my voice,....they live that life.

Together now we stand knowing "Our Voice Matters".

There are still times, I will yearn to revert back to the "hidden voice"  Fear.  Knowing one's place.  Comfort in Failure.  Longing for Love (even fake love) will re-enforce the "hidden voice".  Through the inspiration of great women, their voice, through my children's voice, I still stand...even with my fears, doubting "My Voice" but reaching to the heavens....because not having "My Voice" would now mean death to my soul.

When I first enter a room filled with people with greater worth than my own,

I am quiet in my hidden fears,

I hear spoken words that do not support "A Woman's Voice",

My heart beats so fast my hearing is dulled by it's sound,

I must speak "My Voice",

I am driven to speak "The Hidden Voice" for women who cannot,

Meekly I begin, almost apologetically,

My voice shaking in fear,

My lips quivering with tears swelling my eyes,

All turn to listen,

Eventually, even those who refuse to hear, turn to listen,

I tell a story,

A story of a woman with a "Hidden Voice",

Who discovers the person she entrusted with "Her Voice",

Has been manipulating and pushing "Her Voice" into silence,

Till one day, she witnesses this entrusted person beginning to manipulate her "Daughter's Voice",

And fear for self is replaced by strength for her "Daughter's Voice",

Silently, and through her "Hidden Voice" this woman teaches her Daughter to let "Her Voice Sing",

Silently, and through her "Hidden Voice" this woman teaches herself to let "Her Voice Sing", because children learn by witnessing,

The story continues and the journey is hard.

But the woman and her children now feel the "Song in their Voice",

And other women witness,

Then the other women begin to feel "Their Voice"

And the important people in the room, listening to this woman, are silent,

For a voice filled with love of life can only be heard gently through the heart.

And when you touch someone's heart with "Your Voice", you enable their "Song in their Voice".

They feel your importance to "Love of Life".  But you don't.

To you the answer is simple,

If you don't speak "Your Voice",

There is always the possibility that somebody's daughter will continue to be silent & endure.

You have struggled out of the death of your soul,

We now live in a world of Global Awareness.

No One's Daughter should ever be left behind to be silent & endure.

Everyone's Daughter should feel their importance in our Global Community, to stand and enable through their "Song in their Voice".

You leave.

As you drive away, you gasp in tears.

"I Have A Voice" you whisper to yourself and you smile through your tears knowing...you have just enabled others to "Have a Voice" too.

Our world is changing....This is our children's world....It's getting better.  V xo

GTOC Blog #39....GTOC tenacity at it's finest!!

It's April 10th....I am home studying for my new career in financing and investing.  The MFDA has yet to commit to licensing me....I am held in limbo, but I move continuously forward.

Why?  Because I believe everyone has the right to proper financial advice, not just those who can afford it.....so I take on an avenue of employment that will provide opportunity for advice for all people, and because personally I am responsible for the expenses of GTOC, no as yet there is no extra funding. Yet, I have been known to take on 2 or 3 employments to fund this GTOC adventure for women...

Why? Because on my finger I wear the ring my father bought for my mother in Ireland.  The claddaugh ring with clearly and symbolically states "I carry your heart in my hands."  I carry the love and passion for the efforts of GTOC in my heart and move forward with it in my hands.

Why?  Because my father has since passed, but the memory of my parents' love, lives forever in my heart as a beacon of hope that true love does exist.  Love for partner, love for family, love for friend and foe, love for neighbor.  To me my parents love story is a love story of epic proportions.

Why also?  Because my father died because he stood for what he believed in.  His actions were his voice.  I try everyday to be my father's daughter....and while I remain steadfast in my voice in standing for women...my friend and photographer Al Murack has captured  my symbolic essence in this photograph...

"While I hold your heart in my hands, relax, I've got you covered,....here via GTOC we shoot for the stars, because if we aimed lower you might end up from where you came, our tenacity supporting yours, will help you get to where your goal is to be."

I apologize if you do not appreciate the symbolism of the gun....I don't think guns do bad things, people do bad things, and with anything at their disposal, guns, knives, cars, hands, fists, sticks, stones, voices, emotions, ... I thank god every morning that I awake, because almost all of these weapons have been used on me.....yet I dare to be gratefully alive...I have always said I have an army of angels protecting me!!....sometimes we choose the bad people in our lives and sometimes they choose us.  Irregardless, one day we wake up, and we realize we might need a little assistance to get us away from the bad person, away from their version of weapon, away to a better quality of life and to do this we must muster up not only all our strengths, but to not go back to the only life we have known,....tenacity as well,....in it's finest hour.  Again and Again.

Why?....because as much as we strive for that better quality of life we know we deserve, there is an innate voice inside that says, no,...hide....it's what we do....it's how we survive....It takes a lot of tenacity, training and support to thrive especially alone. 

And so everyday, at GTOC, we thrive, even in our failures, our hiccups on the way to thriving,....we believe;

those of you who have done harm to us, we still believe in you, you simply are going to have to get there without the ability to hurt us any longer.
those of you who try....everyday, or even most days....you will thrive, just never stop believing.  It's how we all get there.

 So as my day work day winds to a close, the MFDA has not responded to my director's urgent reminders to move forward with my licensing, I stand  tall, tenacity at it's finest, knowing and living my belief that all will be fine, all will endure, because like my parent's love has endured through death, the tenacity in me must continue through life....where there is life, their is opportunity,....where there is life there is love,...and like my wonderful friend Brian says " Veronica's gun is loaded with love...." 

Thank you to my community for believing in me, in the efforts of GTOC....it sparks and fires my tenacity of voice for GTOC's wonderfully Aspiring women!!!  V xo